Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Tipping Point

I think the best and worst of midlife is exactly in the name - it's MIDlife. We no longer have the energy of 15 or 20 years ago, but we're not yet seen as too old to be irrelevant (I hope!). No one expects me to fly like a 22-yr-old, but my head can still be in the game with lots to offer.

But here's my question: What's the Tipping Point between being mentored and being a mentor?

When Beck and I were church planting in Chilliwack, Canada, some 10 years ago, I frequently had to deal with the "you're too young to be a pastor" comment. (It may have been six or so years ago that people stopped saying that. It might have been the grey hair, or receding hairline that increased my perceived age-eligibility for the pastorate.)  But I've now reached the age where the people I have the opportunity to shepherd are mostly younger than me. 

That means I'm often expected to have answers or be able to offer direction simply because I'm older. It also means young people look at me and think, "You're an old dude." Old enough to mentor.

Yet I don't feel very old, and and I long to receive mentoring and spiritual direction from older, godly men. Young enough to be mentored.

And my peer group - well, we're trying to navigate the complexities of midlife together. 

So I feel I'm at the tipping point now, about to cross from "mostly asking advice" to "mostly offering guidance". I'm wondering, is it really an either/or matter? Can I have it both ways?

I guess I am looking forward to a final day when this will be true:
"When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. Now we see things imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely." 1 Corinthians 13:11-12.